He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
