we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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