very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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