he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
