I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
