He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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