I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house