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• (805): View more from California

  all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.

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• 

  27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (937): View more from Ohio

  They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"

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• 

  These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever

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• (212): View more from New York

  you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window

  (212): View more from New York

  i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.

  (616): View more from Michigan

  is that what this stuff is?

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.

  (1-704): View more from North Carolina

  1. Thanks. 2. No.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Moral of the story: fuckboys never change

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