Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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