he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize