Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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