So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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