ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
