No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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