If i come over, it means nothing
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
