Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
