She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I understand Curling. That high.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Randomize
