You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Blood and glitter go together right?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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