Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize