as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
