You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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