Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I just saw a hot homeless man
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
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You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
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I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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