you would pick up someone in the library
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
