Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
