do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
