I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
