Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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