Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
