STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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