i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
