I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
