i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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