I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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