i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Randomize
