he wants to bone in the snuggie
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
