I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
