The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
