We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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