and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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