Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize