1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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