And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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