How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
