I wanna passion pit in your ass
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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