can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
