marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize