i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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