Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
