Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize