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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (415): View more from California

  Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted

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• (409): View more from Texas

  Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (360): View more from Washington

  Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.

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• (587): View more from Alberta

  The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.

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• (941): View more from Florida

  We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.

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