Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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